pacific banana (1981)

"I thought I'd come and look at your joystick!"
Paul (Robin Stewart) and Martin (Graeme Blundell) are a pair of Australian pilots working for a small island hopping airline, chasing girls as they go.
Desperately unfunny sex comedy full of predatory females, gay stereotypes and custard pie fight!

martyrs (2008)

aka Mártires .
"She's still alive."
Lucie (Mylène Jampanoï) is kidnapped and abused as a child. Fifteen years later, she and her childhood friend Anna (Morjana Alaoui) want revenge, but get more than they bargained for.
Bloody revenge thriller mutates into a twisted horror.

[rec] 3 - genesis (2012)

"Uncle are you OK?"
A couple (Leticia Dolera & Diego Martín) and friends are celebrating their wedding, when one of the guests, who earlier complained that a dog had bit him, bites another guest...let the mayhem begin!
Paralleling the [Rec] story, drawing together some of the elements from the previous two installments, whilst adding some black humour along the way. An entertaining horror, but only if seen in isolation to the previous two installments.

[rec] 2 (2009)

aka REC 2: Fear Revisited.
"Through the sign of the cross, free us of our enemies, our lord."
Following on from Rec, the building has been quarantined, and a swat team are sent in to help a doctor ascertain what is going on. But when one of their number is attacked and the doctor subdues him with prayer, they know that there is more going on than they have been told.
Adding an element of demoniac possession to the story just takes away the impact of the first installment.

mark of the phoenix (1958)

"...the world's greatest jewel thief..."
A new alloy is stolen and made into a cigarette case, so it can be smuggled out of Belgium. Unfortunately an American jewel thief (Sheldon Lawrence) is mistakenly given the case, and finds himself sought out by the smugglers and the police, in the shape of Inspector Schell (Anton Diffring).
Ignore the plot holes, and this makes for an entertaining thriller. Otherwise its an infuriating and cheap filler.

two evil eyes (1990)

aka Due occhi diabolici.
"Perversity is one of the prime impulses of the heart."
Two horror tales based on short stories by Edgar Allan Poe. The first is The Facts in the Case of Mr. Valdemar, where a man is hypnotised, so his adulterous wife (Adrienne Barbeau) can get hold of his considerable wealth. Unfortunately for her, he dies whilst in the trance and stuck in limbo seeks revenge. The second story is that of the Black Cat. Police photographer (Harvey Keitel) resents his girlfriend's new cat, and the feeling is soon mutual, with each tormenting the other. That is until he kills the feline, but then finds that it isn't willing to leave just yet!
Two stories that pass the time in a convoluted manner.