the relic (1997)

"Something's wrong... This brain is light - even for a man."
A museum in Chicago has an unwelcome visitor, that has a taste for a select part of the human brain, and homicide detective Vincent D'Agosta (Tom Sizemore) tries to find out who. He's joined in the hunt by evolutionary biologist Dr. Green (Penelope Ann Miller), both hoping to get to the bottom of who, or what, is doing all the chomping.
Taut thriller, with good character development, that makes for an eminently watchable creature feature.

ladies who do (1963)

"It's uncanny. How does he do it?"
A cleaner (Peggy Mount), lucks onto some insider information, and through her contact The Colonel (Robert Morley), makes a tidy sum. This sets them thinking that if they went in with her fellow cleaners, they could all make some money. Then when she finds out one of her bosses (Harry H. Corbett) has bought her street and plans to knock it down to build flats, the scheme takes on a more earnest turn.
Clichéd look at the East End in 1963, full of self made men determined to 'improve' the lot of the working classes by breaking up communities and scattering them to the winds. But this still proves to be an entertaining comedy, all be it, not one that will have you rolling in the aisles.

slaughter of the vampires (1962)

aka La strage dei vampiri. Curse of the Blood Ghouls. Curses of the Ghouls.
"In nature there is good and bad..."
Wolfgang (Walter Brandi) has a problem, his castle has become the residence of a vampire (Dieter Eppler), and what's more, a vampire that has taken a fancy to his wife Louise (Graziella Granata).
With acting that veers from wooden to over the top, and a script to match, this is neither a classic or camp enough to merit more than a passing glance.

anaconda (1997)

"Where is he taking us?"
A documentary crew, (including Jennifer Lopez and Ice Cube), pick up a local hunter (Jon Voight) whilst journeying up the Amazon in an attempt to find a lost tribe. Unfortunately for them the hunter has other plans, involving catching a giant anaconda, and he needs their boat to do so, but obviously the Anaconda has other plans, not wanting to become a zoo exhibit.
Formulaic, but entertaining, if only for Voight's leering performance.

the blue eyes Of the broken doll (1976)

aka Los ojos azules de la muñeca rota. House of Psychotic Women. The House of Doom.
"We're nobodies, absolutely nothing."
Gilles (Paul Naschy) is taken on as caretaker by three strange sisters, who own a large estate. Michelle (Inés Morales) is paraplegic, Claude (Dina Lorys) has a deformed hand, and Nicole (Eva Léon), a vamp who wastes no time in getting hands on with the staff! Gilles in turn seduces Claude, but is plagued with nightmares that feature him strangling women. But more troubling is the arrival of a serial killer targeting blonde, blue-eyed women, whose eyes he takes, but why?
Atmospheric, meandering, but intriguing tale, littered with clues and macguffin's.

dawn of the dead (2004)

"I don't want to die here."
Ana (Sarah Polley), a nurse working nights, clocks off and goes to sleep, missing the zombie outbreak. When she awakes her world has turned upside-down. In need of somewhere secure and away from the zombies, she stumbles on and takes shelter in a mall with Kenneth (Ving Rhames) and a number of others.
Re-versioning the original, and providing enough changes to make it an entertaining watch. Its main innovation being that the zombies now have lightning reactions, upping the anti on the previous versions.

piranha 3dd (2012)

"I'm not afraid of some punk ass water."
The Piranha are back to terrorise the teens at a newly re-opened water park, co-owned by Maddy (Danielle Panabaker). Helped by her friends Barry (Matt Bush) and Kyle (Chris Zylka), they look for a way to stop the shoal from snacking on her patrons.
Gross out teen comedy wrapped around the well known fish story wreaking havoc on said teens. Enlivened by some fine cameo's, but its still not a patch on those that went before.

day of the dead (2008)

aka Day of the Dead: The Need to Feed. "Nothing happens in this town anyway."
A small Colorado town is quarantined by the army, in what they are calling a routine exercise, bt in reality military scientists have developed a virolant virus that soon turns much of the towns inhabitants into flesh devouring zombies. Holding out are a small group of survivors led by Sarah Bowman (Mena Suvari), but can they survive until help arrives, if help is arriving at all. Good special effects only serve to show the rest of this film up, for what it is, a half arsed attempt to leach off the good name of the original Day of the Dead.

leviathan (1989)

"I know this now... the Russians deliberately sank that ship to protect themselves. Maybe to protect us all."
An undersea mining facility comes across a sunken Russian sub, the Leviathan. A sub that looks like it has been deliberately sunk. But it's only when one of the crew drinks some vodka from the wreak that the trouble starts, as the crewman starts to genetically modify, and is hungry for blood.
Mix The Thing with Alien and add a dash of The Abyss, and you have this unremarkable thriller.

incubus (1982)

"I've been having these dreams..."
Sheriff (John Ireland) and doctor Sam Cordell (John Cassavetes) investigate a series of sexual murders. Meanwhile Sam's daughter Jenny (Erin Noble) is friends with Tim (Duncan McIntosh) who complains that he has nightmares about rape and murder and believes that he his the killer.
Tense detective thriller, which unfortunately doesn't hold up.