10.5.15

loves a luxury! (1952)

aka The Caretaker's Daughter.
"If this nightmare doesn't end soon,I'll go raving mad."
A theatre producer and an actor go to the country for a quiet weekend, when the producer's wife comes to b but all does not go to plan.
A frenetic farce that runs from one set piece to the next. All the time forgetting to bring the comedy along.

lady in the car with glasses and a gun (1970)

"I am not lying. I have not been here before!"
Danielle (Samantha Eggar) is given the job of returning her bosses car to Paris, but decides to drive to the cote d'azur on a whim instead, as it's somewhere she's never been before, but is puzzled as she starts to be recognised everywhere she goes. Her confusion only grows when she meets Philippe (John McEnery), and the mystery deepens.
Fabulously shot, and intriguing thriller.

hammerhead (1968)

"My God! You're a spy, I really hoped you were an international jewel thief."
Criminal mastermind Hammerhead (Peter Vaughan) is suspected of trying to steal defense secrets, by British Intelligence. To get proof, they enlist the dashing Charles Hood (Vince Edwards) to root Hammerhead out, all the while bumping into kooky model Sue (Judy Geeson).
Stylish thriller, featuring Diana Dors. Unfortunately it also features a very uncharismatic lead male!

the green hornet (2011)

"I know how to make them take us seriously."
Trustafarian Britt Reid (Seth Rogan) is a dick! But then his father, a well respected Newspaper owner dies, and with the help of his father's assistant Kato (Jay Chou) he decides have some fun by becoming the Green Hornet.
A fine actioner is spoilt by the presence of Seth Rogan.

i frankenstein (2014)

"You're only a monster if you behave like one."
Having killed his creator, Adam (Aaron Eckhart) is attacked by demons. The Gargoyles save him and drag him into the age old war between the Gargoyles and demons.
Film that throws out the Frankenstein story in the first minute, to try and replicate the Underworld franchise. Unfortunately like Frankenstein's monster, this film has no real soul.

centurion (2010)

"I am a soldier of Rome, I will not yield."
Quintus Dias (Michael Fassbender) is a Roman soldier captured by the Picts. Freed by the Ninth legion, he joins them, only for them to be massacred, leaving him and a few others alone behind enemy lines...
Well made action/adventure, though one that I couldn't help feeling for the invaded Picts, who are defending their lands, rather than the brutish Roman invaders.

war of the satellites (1958)

"The warning from outer space was valid. It came from a superior intelligence."
The United Nations is funding manned satellite research, but they are are being destroyed by an unknown force. Then Aliens reveal they are declaring war on Earth when the U.N. refuse to stop building the space stations. It's up to Dave (Dick Miller) and Sybil (Susan Cabot) to save the day.
Run of the mill sci-fi, with little of note to recommend it.

chappie (2015)

"We need to steel his remote." South Africa in the near future has a police force with mechanized officers. One such officer is damaged when it runs into Ninja & Yo-Landi, two crooks in desperate need of a large amount of cash to pay off their drug lord. With the help of its inventor the robot develops artificial intelligence, and under Ninja's tutelage Chappie soon learns how harsh life on the streets can be.
Surprisingly effective actioner, that also makes you think.

hunter prey (2010)

"He's the last of his kind."
A prisoner transport ship crashes onto an unknown planet and awaits rescue. Meanwhile their prisoner has escaped and they try to recapture him before relief arrives, but who is the hunter and who the hunted?
Low of budget, but an effective little thriller none the less.

frankenstein meets the spacemonster (1965)

aka Duel of the Space Monsters. Mars Attacks Puerto Rico. Mars Invades Puerto Rico. Operation San Juan.
"I'm absolutely positive nothing can go wrong."
Aliens lead by Princess Marcuzan (Marilyn Hanold) and Dr. Nadir (Lou Cutell) attack a number of space probes, in the belief that they are missiles. The pair pursue one damaged probe, and its robot pilot frank (Robert Reilly) as it lands on Puerto Rico, and its up to Dr Steele (James Karen) and his assistant Karen Grant (Nancy Marshall) to stop their evil plans...
A stock footage low budgeter, from the so bad it's good model.

what a carry on! (1949)

"I don't think I want to play at soldiers."
The army life appeals to Jimmy and Ben (Jimmy Jewel & Ben Warriss) and immediately become embroiled with their sergeant-major (Josef Locke).
Minimal plotting allows for the duo's comic routines to come thick and fast.

the hand (1960)

"He says he sold his hand for £500."
Three British soldiers are tortured when captured in Burma. With two returning to civilian life minus their right hands. Years later Inspector Munyard (Ronald Leigh-Hunt) investigates the case of an inveterate alcoholic who has £500 on him, and one amputated right hand. At first the police disbelieve his story, until he's murdered...
Quick moving, though slight, thriller.

ambush on leopard street (1962)

"Do you know what this place is?...It's a high class striptease club..."
A gang plans the perfect robbery. Unfortunately they do go on about it, rather than taking care of business.
A nice snapshot of British life, but little else of note in this low budget less than thriller.

the sicillians (1964)

"I got another warning to lay off the case."
An American embassy aide, Calvin Adams (Robert Hutton), gets involved in solving a kidnapping, when the son of a mafia boss is lifted at London airport. Soon he's on a flight to Paris and hanging out at La Cravette, run by Mme. Perrault (Ursula Howells).
Overly talky thriller, but it does feature the usual Butcher's nightclub scene.

operation diplomat (1953)

"You don't have to bribe me to save a mans life."
Dr Mark Fenton (Guy Rolfe) is persuaded to operate on a mystery patient. The next night a foreign office official mentions the Governments chief of defense has disappeared, and Fenton realises that this was the patient. Then his fellow surgeon is murdered in his home, and the police inevitably disbelieve his story. That leaves Fenton only one option to clear his name...
Brisk and likable thriller, but one that won't stay in the memory for long.

the long and the short and the tall (1961)

aka Jungle Fighters
"I'll stick the bayonet in his guts myself."
1942, and a motley troop made up of various colonial nationalities take a Japanese soldier prisoner, and various factions come out, from those that want to abide by the Geneva Convention, and those who would rather kill him and have done with it.
A tort character study into the effects of war.